Love Always Protects, Always Trusts, Always Hopes, Always Perseveres

So Valentine’s Day came and went! I was so beat that day I couldn’t even have handled a date. But I don’t remember the last time I went for a date on Valentine’s Day so we’re good, right? I’m sticking to that story! I hope you enjoyed it though! Now, today’s post.

 I’m the ferocious kind of mother, you know, like a lion protecting her cub or better yet, a hen protecting her chicks (we had a fierce hen when we were growing up so this is a very good example for me. She fought crows this hen!). Nobody touches my son and I remain silent. Nobody makes choices for my son that I don’t approve or approve of.

That reminds me of a conversation I had with my mum and sisters when I was home for New Year’s celebrations. My mum’s been asking me to get my son circumcised since he was a toddler (or was it at birth?) and a few weeks before that conversation my dad had revived that issue in my absence. And once again I reiterated my position on this subject (which is obvious considering we were having that conversation for the twentieth time or so). At least I had the support of one of my sisters (you rock Aunty Thelma!) but all the others were on mum’s team. I don’t hold it against anyone though because we have differing ideas and ideologies on many things and I’ve made peace with that.

There are times when people have tried to harm my son (and sometimes it was perceived but you can never be too careful, no?) and they saw me in a different light. Let’s just say, many people know not to mess with that little boy. And he knows I’m there to protect him so if anyone crosses his path he won’t hesitate to come to me. He also knows I'll spank the black off of him if he is the one on the wrong. Just saying!

Unconditional

My relationship with Christ has been an interesting one over the years. I’ve been in trouble so many times for my choices and decisions but He still stuck by me. I got pregnant out of wedlock but he gave me a smooth pregnancy and safe delivery and a handsome healthy baby. He stopped a matatu just in time to prevent a head-on collision with a motorbike I was on (the bumpers almost touched). He kept me safe on roads about which you would hear gory incidents almost every day.

I’ve made many mistakes but He still continues to lift me higher, to increase me, to answer my prayers, to love me. I’m very sure that anyone who wants to cause drama or chaos in my life really has it rough because my God fights for me. Sometimes I don’t even know what’s going on until much later. It doesn’t matter what I’ve done or not done because it’s all hinged on His love for me, not my actions.

Love inspires love

That doesn’t mean I keep messing up intentionally. I try to live right and make my God proud, just like my son tries to do things right to make me smile and compliment and appreciate him and his efforts. You see, the fact that I know God will keep loving, trusting and protecting me and that His love will not waver even when I’m being stupid gives me more zeal to love Him more. Same happens with human relationships.

When you know that someone will love you through the chaos of your life you love that person even more. That maintains the supply of love to each person in that relationship. When you choose to love someone (love is indeed a choice), love them knowing that they will fail you sometimes, they will annoy you, they will hurt you. But your love for them will stir up something in them that wants to reciprocate how you make them feel. And then that changes a person and gradually transforms them into a better soul. I’m proof of that.

Love fiercely, always protecting, trusting, persevering and hoping for the best. Don’t let the negativity and chaos blind you to the treasure that lies in the other person.       

Going Against the Grain

People have expectations of us. That’s just something we can’t run away from. If it’s not your mum it’s your dad, your brother, your sister, your children, your spouse, your friends, your employer or even your enemies! Granted, all expectations come about due to different reasons but they all seem to want something for you.  

More often than not you don’t really want to live up to these expectations. You probably have your own expectations for yourself and they are probably very different from what everyone thinks they are. In this age where everything is hinged on education certificates with big names and careers to go with them many people get lost in the madness and very few realize it because, well, isn’t everyone going back to school?

Have you ever woken up one day and felt like you are in the wrong place? Like, what am I doing here? And you can’t really answer this one question that will justify why you do what you do. That’s a scary thing to realize considering you spend half of your day doing that which you don’t know.

The thought of leaving or quitting is absolutely terrifying and the thought of staying, draining to say the least. You’ll think about what everyone else will say or think (yet surprisingly these very people don’t spend your dreary days and tired nights with you) and you don’t want to go through the agony of dealing with their questions. That’s mainly because you’re afraid that your answers won’t be satisfactory to them. But whose satisfaction should we be looking at here?

Wishes and dreams

I wish I could stay home and raise my kids, I wish I could go back to school and get a PhD, I wish I could quit my high-flying job to be a farmer, I wish I could raise my kids and keep my high-flying job, I wish I could just sing for a living, I wish I could be a hand model, I wish I could tell a story with my photography, I wish I could be a father… why not?

I believe that the fact that this thought more than crossed your mind counts for something. It didn’t stop at being a thought though. With time it’s become a nagging feeling that you can’t wish away anymore. It shakes your core but your response is to brush it off. Why do we do that? Stop ourselves from getting where we would like to be?

Sometimes the dream (yes, it’s a dream until you wake up and do something about it) may seem so farfetched that you wonder whether it is truly possible. For me, this is where my God comes in. It’s been said that if your dream is something you can easily achieve with your own effort or strength then it’s not really big enough. So if you’re going to dream, DREAM BIG.

Divine sustenance 

Going against what is expected of you isn’t easy at all. It is a sure recipe to lose fans along the way. It is a painful process that will sometimes have you doubting whether you truly made the right choice, heard the right voice. But when the satisfaction comes in, going to bed with a feeling of real accomplishment, you know deep down in your heart that you made the right move.

God doesn’t take you somewhere He can’t sustain you. In fact, He does this crazy thing where on paper you look like you should be falling apart but when we look at you it looks like you have a lot going for you. Call it whatever you want but I call it grace.

I’m not using religion to hide behind all the decisions I’ve made along the way because some of them were horrible. I’m just telling you what I’ve seen happening in my own life and others close to me. That going after your dream, doing what you feel is right may not be easy but is well worth it in the end. That the steps of the righteous are ordered by God and everything works for good to those that love the Lord and are called according to His purpose. Someone somewhere said being different, going against the grain of society, is the greatest thing in the world. Dare to be great this year!